ah.

lelophant:

lelophant:

lelophant:

lelophant:

lelophant:

i am Distressed

it’s five in the fuc king morning and ive been staring at a wall for three hours trying to think of what this thing is called. it’s like. fuckin the greatest invention humanity has ever come up with and there like. bread sticks but they taste sweet and they’re more square

isn’t there like a country in the name too.. hungary cinnamon bread. great britain sticks. france bread

france bred france brad france bread france sticks francebreadsticks France France revolution

FRENCH TOAST STICKS

(via those-dancing-gays)

sonypraystation:

sonicthehedgegod:

phoneus:

asgardreid:

cardozzza:

dannydanuselessstuff:

artaline:

human: *is heating up food*

alien: why are you doing that?

human: you see i want the particles in my food to vibrate at just the right frequency

Human: *is eating ice cream*

alien: wait you forgot to make that one vibrate!

human: well, you see, not with this food

This one is already vibrating at he desired frequency, but if it starts to vibrate at a higher frequency I lock it back in the cold box.

Human: *just reheated pizza in the oven*

Other human: *is eating a slice of the same pizza, but cold*

Alien: *exasperated sputtering*

why the fuck wouldn’t an alien understand heat

or that you heat food to kill bacteria

human: *lights big fat fucking blunt*

Alien: ayeee know what that iss my nigga pass dat shit!!

(via genderwow)

kerosene:

I don’t need to know anything beyond counting to 2 (maximum number of nipples and dollars i will ever have)

(via cornonyourcob)